i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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