Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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