I seem to have left my pride at pride
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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