the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
home. puking in laundry basket.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
