it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
