Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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