Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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