So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Randomize
