I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize