Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
