Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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