I'm really into asian looking animals
where am i from again
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
