I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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