Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
thus making me awesome and them whores
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize