Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
