Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
He did a backflip because drugs
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