I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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