I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
