apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
