So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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