Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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