So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
