wat bout pragnant strippers??
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
