I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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