And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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