Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
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