he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
