Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Randomize
