He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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