who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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