If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
