problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize