I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Randomize