I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize