shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
