He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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