shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
