I heard we made out
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Randomize
