so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
