Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Randomize