I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
