good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize