Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
