I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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