i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
