Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
