You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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