Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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