You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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