Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
