you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
